Where Worth Comes From

🔥 Surprise! It’s exactly what you think.

Hey there, friend,

Today, I was responding to a message in the vent channel in my Discord, and it got me thinking about you.

Basically, the member (I’ll keep their name private) was expressing how, because others didn’t understand him or see him for who he truly was, he felt like maybe he just deserved to be misunderstood, or perhaps that he wasn’t worth understanding at all.

Sound like a familiar feeling?

Here’s how my response went:

Please do not resign your worth to what other people see in you. You are worth so much more than you or anyone else could ever put words to, simply because you’re alive and have a body that works so hard to keep you alive.

Your worth comes what you do, not what you look like. It comes from how you treat others, not how others treat you. And it especially comes from the person you choose to be*, not the person others choose to* see*.*

Some people are so dedicated to misunderstanding you that they can’t even fathom that they’re being the asshole, not you. I deal with that a lot as an autistic person. They’re so used to polite being normal that, when they’re given another normal (our normal), they’re taken aback.

But their feelings are not always valid. Sometimes they’re misunderstanding and unwilling to see that.

To put it simply: Your worth is determined by you, not anybody else.

Yes, external success like followers and money can make you seem more “worthy.”

But worthy of what?

Attention?

Money?

Fans?

Stuff that we know doesn’t make us happy?

I don’t want that!

I want anything I know makes me happy, like my special interests, my real friends, and my little sweet treats I give to myself throughout the day.

Maybe that’s just a cope, but… I wasn’t happy when I was making lots of money.

I wasn’t as stressed about my cost of living, of course, but I wasn’t happy.

And I wasn’t happy when I was constantly adopting other people’s opinions about me as the truth, either.

I’m not completely free from that chokehold, but I’m happier every day I decide not to give it power.

So no, your worth is not determined by anybody but yourself.

Because you’re the only one who knows what you truly want in the first place, anyways.

Think of it like this: To be hated by somebody awful is the greatest compliment.

See what I mean?

x, Atlas